Posts Tagged ‘bathroom’

9th November
2010
written by Jay

Books are wonderful things, you already know that. Bathrooms are , for the most part, very pleasant places. Really, the worse you have to go, the better they become. Right?

So if books are wonderful and bathrooms are pleasant then what better place to read a book? Your dad is a big proponent of reading in the bathroom. Sure it takes a while for that toilet seat to reach a comfortable temperature, but once it does… Bliss! There is no better place to read. Full stop.

There is however a slight problem with bathrooms and books. You see, activities that are traditionally performed in bathrooms have a common denominator. That thing is… Water! There is a good reason that bathrooms are designed the way they are. Bathrooms are made to withstand the onslaught that is moisture (I hate that word). Lack of carpet, high gloss paint, tiles… Books on the other hand are made of a material (paper) that is anything but impervious to water in all its forms generally found in the one room in the house where it’s OK to splish and splash.

So while reading in the bathroom is a very relaxing past time, if you forget your book in the bathroom after you are done…

DISASTER! There is nothing worse than to try turning a soppy wet page stuck to another one. Even if, in between showers, your book has enough time to recuperate to its fully dry state, your book (that you love so much) will have curled pages. Yuk! Reading in the bathroom, fine… Just don’t leave your reading material sitting around.

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17th February
2010
written by Jay

Some people will tell you that if there is ever a question, you should pee now. Holding it up will lead to accidents. While in general that is true, please know that the kind of people that say that, aren’t really in it for your benefit. You see, when adults ask you if you need to go to the bathroom, what they are really asking is: If you piss on the backseat of my car, can I get away with claiming it wasn’t my fault?

If your mom asks you if you have to go, and you don’t there is no use faking it. Mom just wants to know that she did everything she could to prevent you from emptying your bladder on daddy’s back seat.

The truth is… You don’t know know that you have to go in 11 minutes… Also, peeing “just because”  will make you weak.  People that go just because the next rest stop/gas station/ grassy knoll is not until another hour or three will suffer the consequences… Incontinence happens to those that pee because they had the opportunity,  not because they had to go! You are a girl, do your Kegels and know there is always a grassy spot somewhere along your trip!

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