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17th February
2010
written by Jay

This one is for when you are a little older… Maybe a young adult, or when you are 40…

Have you ever heard the “If not you then who. If not now then when” Blah Blah Blah… I usually don’t agree. I mean, come on! Just because you don’t want to do you job, why should it be tagged on to my curriculum? Huh? But there is one instance where the “If not you then who, if not now then when?” mantra hold totally true. You see, the children of this world deserve your smile.  I strongly believe that the children of today are our future. However, some of them, are not as loved as you… They don’t see adults (or young adults, like you will be in a few years) smile at them. If we don’t smile at the children we see, who will? All children of the world deserve that we smile at them. If we don’t, is the only smile they see today the one in the mirror? And what if they are hungry, can’t make the fair to take the bus to school? Will they have anything to smile about?

We owe it to all children in the world to smile! Go on, put on that happy face, and make a kid happy today!

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5th February
2010
written by Jay

or… All politicians are crooks!

It’s worse in the US than in Australia. Take George W. Bush, for instance.  But overall, you have to believe that all politicians are inherently evil. Vote when you can. Vote for the party (not the guy/gal) you think will get the job done, but don’t expect too much out of these clowns. After all, the only things clowns are good for is making balloon animals and scaring the crap out of small children (and most adults too).

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13th January
2010
written by Gretchen

If someone tells you “that is impossible”, question it! Believe in the Impossible. Many things are improbable and a few are near crazy, but if you believe in something enough you might just achieve it.

I had a teacher/mentor who once told me to forget the “see it to believe it” phrase and instead adopt a “you have to believe it to see it” attitude. Use this whenever you have doubts. I am not saying that it will make these doubts disappear, but it will help you through them. Believing that anything you wish, desire, crave, is a possibility, is a much, much better way to go through life than to say something is impossible.

Life can be hard but always try to achieve your innermost desires. Believe that nothing is impossible!

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12th January
2010
written by Jay

You can learn a lot about yourself by looking back. That doesn’t mean you should live in the past, your life is here and now. But in trying to be the best you can be (whatever you feel that is), look at what went on before today. What shaped you, what made you, the person you are today? Some of it it is pleasant (your first kiss) some of it is not (the day your best friend died), but all of it defines who you are today and what is on the long road ahead of you. Some people call it Karma, I call it Life.

Don’t forget to look at your family’s past either. There are some interesting stories there.  You have an aunt in the Netherlands, your daddy lives in the United States (but grew up in Holland). Your grandfather (on your mom’s side) was born in England. Your grandmother (on your dad’s side) was born in Indonesia. Her father was in a war camp there, held prison by the Japanese.

You share your last name with a group of islands in the Pacific.

Let your past be a guide to your future!

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10th January
2010
written by Jay

Well, having said that… Sometimes they are right. The problem is not so much that they are wrong per se, but that they are never accurate enough to be useful. They are always off, by days, inches/centimeters, degrees, you name it.

Take for instance the snow they predicted for this week in Memphis. They said we would have one to two inches (that’s 2.5 to 5 centimeters) of snow. Truth is, we barely had enough for one snow cone. The weather folks also predicted a high of 18 degrees (Farenheit) for Chicago. Trust me, I was there, it never even got close to 18!  And while I understand that its entirely difficult to predict a tornado, a hurricane comes with plenty of fair warning, but they can’t get it right!

Sometimes they are days off the mark! Here is how I read the weather… If the guy on TV says that there is a slight chance of rain, Bring an umbrella. The less they think it will rain, the more likely the torrential downpour will be. Conversely, if the weather moron tells you we will get at least a meter of snow by the end of the day… Be sure to bring enough sunscreen for the entire beach!

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10th January
2010
written by Jay
You talking to me punk?

You talking to me punk?

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28th December
2009
written by Jay

When your mother and I found out we were going to have a child, I was in heaven. Funny, we never considered that you could turn out a boy. Before you were born and before we knew for sure we always referred to you as “she”. Had you indeed turned out a boy, think of all the money we would have to sink into psychiatrist bills… Ouch! So when it was established you were indeed an unborn child of the female persuasion, that heaven I talked about above, became that much brighter. That was until today, when I realized that being a girl comes with some very serious consequences. In some circles these are called: Boobs!

You see, being a female, you will develop (over time, although I am already working on a piece of equipment that will stunt this) a bodily feature that, for a lot of people — Men and women alike, but mostly men — is the object of several unmentionable thoughts. One more time, we call them: Boobs!

The whole idea of these mounds of flesh protruding from your chest is to cover them up at all times until you find the one person in the world that you so truly love (in a way different from loving your parents, or that Disney movie, or ice cream, or gazing at the stars, or, or, or…) that you want to show him (or her) these things that seemingly had no meaning prior to meeting this person. Before that time, they are just awkward.  Society has long ago decided that this extra you carry around (or will in the near future)  should look a certain way, and because of this you will have the joy (unlike boys) to be shopping for garments called: Bras!

There is a whole psychology behind this embarrassing experience, but we will leave that for another day…

The problem with these boob things is that there is so much secrecy surrounding them, that large throngs of people have made it their self-appointed task to uncover them. They show no scruples and will go to any length to have them uncovered. They will try to convince you that you should bare your chest for them, even if you don’t love them in that special way. We commonly refer to that segment of the population as: Horn dogs!

All I can say is: Fight the horn dogs, uncovering your boobs should be left for very, very, very special occasions. Occasions, I can only hope, will not occur for you until the age of 76.

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28th December
2009
written by Jay

While it’s entirely possible that you might hear us use phrases such as “Oh, grow up” in your direction, what we really mean by that is usually more along the lines of  “Stop arguing with me”. There is no hurry to grow up. When a parent tells you to grow up, what he or she is trying to tell you is “I am just a kid myself and I am entirely exasperated having to act like a grown up around you”. No seriously! I am nearly 40 and I never really had the feeling I was a grown-up. Matter of fact, I make it a point not to. I still collect stuffed animals, I still gaze up at the stars (making my neighbors think “who is that lunatic in unit #1?”), I still get a kick out of driving through a puddle — Although these days I do it in a car and not on a bicycle.

Don’t be in a hurry, I’ve said that before, but mostly… There is a kid in all of us. Never lose sight of your inner-child!

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23rd December
2009
written by Jay

When you were first home, after having been in the hospital for 4 weeks, I “wrote” you a little poem. I put that in quotes because it’s rather grotesque (as in: Illusions of grandeur) to think that I was actually writing poetry. I was simply trying to find things that rhymed, because, quite frankly, you were wailing like a banshee at the time. But it worked, you shut up! Originally that “poem” read:

Where is my little bear?
It’s right there, it’s right there.
What color is my bink?
It’s pink, it’s pink.
Are my eyes blue?
It’s true missy-moo.
But where is my bear?
RIGHT THERE!

Since, at a mere three point five months of age (yours, not mine), it has come to my attention that you destroyed that pink bink. For readers outside the US, a binkie is also known as a pacifier (but that doesn’t rhyme with pink). Your Mom tried to buy you a new one but the teat (or nipple) was too small for your liking. I guess we will have to retire this poem to memory. I briefly suggested we would change the whole bink line to “Who is a dummy? Your mummy, your mummy”, much to the chagrin of your female parental unit.

Goodbye silly poem, you will shortly be replaced by a new one.

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22nd December
2009
written by Jay

Immerse! Life can be taken in no time flat. I am not going to lie to you. There are cancers, there is AIDS, there are guns, tragic accidents, and a whole slew of other things that can abruptly take a life (like some bonehead trying to send a text message while zipping down the M5 at 130 kilometers an hour). The only way you have to battle this vast wasteland of dangers is to make the most of your life, and that of others, on a daily basis. Live your life to the fullest. Make every moment meaningful and make sure that you do so in a way that makes it meaningful for as many people as you can. Immerse yourself in the ocean that is youth. You never know when it’s gone…

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